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Fat is Feminine, Go Eat Chocolate

Hear me out in this one, but I hope that every lady will feel inspired to eat a rich chocolate bar in a fruity bubble bath after reading this.

Before I get to that though, I need to define a few key terms.

The Divine Feminine and The Divine Masculine

The Universe is made from duality: light and dark, day and night, life and death, hot and cold, and feminine and masculine.

As human and energetic beings, we have both the divine feminine and the divine masculine energies within us. They are the makeup of who we are, and they are within all of us, whether we were born male or female.

We are meant to have more balanced energies, like the yin and yang; however, throughout the centuries, we as humans have lost that balance.

I am now going to describe the energies with a few key words so that you understand the roles these energies play in our being.

The Divine Feminine: nurturing, intuitive, expressive, emotional, gentle, healing, wise, patient, flexible, fertile, flowing, receiving, being, allowing…

The Divine Masculine: firm, rational, strong, loyal, leading, adventurous, protective, active, logical, survival, creating, doing, acting…

I want to stress that these energies are found in BOTH males and females. We need both the masculine and feminine in order to be human. The ratio may be different depending on the person and their gender, but that does not always have to be the case.

The Tilted Scale

I think it is very apparent that in society there is an unbalance between the feminine and the masculine. The feminine has been rejected and the masculine idolized. We see it in strong capitalist ideals, hustle culture, physique competitions, long workdays, increased violence, jealousy, and competition, etc.

For some reason, we as a species have decided to reject the feminine in pursuit of the masculine, ripping us from our true alignment.

We need both energies. We cannot be strong without being gentle, we cannot be rational without being intuitive, we cannot be active without proper rest, we cannot be firm without being nurturing, we cannot create without receiving, we cannot force without flow.

Balanced masculine energy looks like someone who is confident but not arrogant, strong but not dominant, protective but not controlling, logical but not faithless, active but not restless, leading but not narcissistic...

Balanced feminine energy looks like someone who is patient but not a pushover, nurturing but not smothering, emotional but not dramatic, intuitive but not deranged, restful but not lazy…

A proper balance between the two looks like someone who is able to both design and create, nurture and protect, give and receive, work and rest, be strong and also gentle, act and allow, do and be, protect and heal, survive and express…

I could go on and on. I could write a whole book about the importance of balancing our masculine and feminine energies, but that is not the purpose of today’s work. The point of me briefly explaining this has to do with the rejection of the natural female body.

Fat is Feminine

Females are built differently than males; it is that simple. We as women were given the gift of creation. We build humans in our abdomen and protect the life force of humanity within our stomachs. Our bodies do not care if we fit within society’s ever-changing beauty standards. They care about creating and protecting life, and we hold a precious layer of fat on our lower bellies for that exact purpose, to keep the uterus safe. We should wear our skin as badges of honor instead of with guilt and shame. Being female is powerful.

I have yet to meet a woman who has never struggled with their body in some sort of way in their lifetime. The desire to be smaller or fitter has been pushed upon us consciously and subconsciously due to society’s abandonment of the divine feminine. Somewhere along the line, masculine energy became dominant, causing most people to feel out of alignment, especially women.

Females began to resent their fat and their curvier bodies. They began to feel the need to be fitter and stronger due to the overflowing masculine energy all around them. But fat is feminine. Softness is divine. Curves are sexy.

I am in no way saying that females who have naturally smaller bodies are not feminine, for there are infinite ways the divine feminine expresses herself. I am focusing on fat because I have seen and experienced fatphobia in many aspects, and I feel called to help expel that destructive mindset. Everyone is divinely made, and I wish that every single person on this earth will learn self-love and acceptance, especially with their physical appearance.

Eat Chocolate in Lingerie

When I think of embodying the divine feminine, I think of dance. I think of sultry expression. I think of decadent dessert and rich chocolate. I think of red silk robes and bubble baths with champagne. I think of belly dancing and body rolls. I think of softness and curves. I think of perfume and lipstick. I think of pampering and relaxation. I think of art and creativity. I think of skinny dipping in the ocean and moonlit adventures. I think of collecting seashells and planting flowers.

I think we have falsely labeled these things as selfish, lazy, extra, dramatic, weak, and inappropriate due to this unbalance of energies and the rejection of the divine feminine. I want us to rewrite this story. I want us to reclaim the power of femininity.

I want us as women to embrace our naturally curvy bodies. I want us to enhance our feminine nature instead of hiding it. We can achieve our goals, work on our careers AND pamper ourselves and find joy in self-care. We can find our natural energetic balance and feel ourselves again, feel whole again. No more feeling the need to change who we were born to be. No more fear of judgement. No more smothering our desires.

We are the physical manifestation of mother nature. We give birth to life! Don’t we deserve to embrace this body and honor our power? We came here to express and experience and sense. We did not come here to hide our true selves and change who we are.

So do what your femininity is calling you to do. Dance if that feels true, treat yourself at the spa, pamper yourself at home with a bath and a warm beverage, meditate all day in nature, purchase your first tarot deck, decorate your house with flowers, drink wine and watch a rom-com, or eat chocolate in your lingerie.

It does not matter what it is that resonates with your divine feminine, I just want each and every one of you to find her within you and give her a much-needed hug. It has been a very long time since she was able to express herself freely. Let her out. Give her the space she needs to feel whole again. Welcome her home.

The Whole Picture

There is obviously an unbalance, there is no doubting that, and I want to note that this is not just a female issue. I focused on female empowerment in this piece, because that is what I felt called to share today. However, men also bear the detrimental effects of this disproportion.

This can be seen in the men who feel the need to hide their emotions, to make all the money, to work hard in the gym to have six pack abs, to make everything a competition, etc.

I want a restoration of balance, not just so women can feel more comfortable in their natural bodies, but so every human can feel the alignment of their innate energies. I want men to be able to cry and pamper themselves just as much as I want females to be able to embrace their PMS. I want the divine feminine to be restored by and for all.

Bottom Line

Balance is one of the keys to life. So please, go find yours.

Whatever it is you need to do in order to rekindle your relationship with the divine feminine, do it, and do not feel selfish about it for one second.

This world needs more people who are living their truth and aligning their energies. We need people to be unapologetically themselves, compassionate towards everyone, and unafraid to defend their right to be true.

If this resonates with you, if you feel called to welcome the feminine home, please set time aside to foster that relationship with yourself. Do not let this spark that you are feeling inside fade away after you close this tab.

If any of you want to reach out to me to discuss more about the divine feminine and how to embrace her energy, please do! I am so passionate about this subject and eager to meet more women who want to experiment with this type of expression.

Also, if you want more inspiration, check out my other post Redefining Beauty and Confidence, I share some more insight into what it really means to be confident, attractive, and beautiful.

As always, I thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my rambles, and I hope that my words have encouraged you to live out your most authentic truth.

With love, light, and gratitude,

Dee xoxo


This photoshoot with my friend, in a dress she picked out and a vineyard we snuck into, was the most confident I have ever felt in my life, and I think it had to do with my reckless expression of the divine feminine. So, trust me, it works.

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